Rage, Rage Against The Dying Of A Theory

In the interest of fairness I should note that Dr John has responded to the death notice for the Glacial Transport theory.  To my eyes it is a chaotic blend of ad hominems, baseless self-cited claims, and a nonsequitous conflation of quarrying with glacial transport, despite the latter’s independence from the former. http://dx.doi.org/10.13140/RG.2.2.36446.96323

To set the record straight, Dr John accuses me of asking Researchgate to tweak my papers typeface to mimic a journal—calling it a ‘cheap stunt.’ I didn’t. Whatever he perceives is mere paranoid pareidolia; I use Word’s default fonts, and Researchgate hosts PDFs as submitted, as he’s well aware.

Blow, ye scholars, and rend your learned tomes! Ye Daw and Bevins, with your quills so sharp, Spout your refutations, drown my boulder’s truth! Rumble, ye journals, with your peer-reviewed scorn! Spit, ye XRF machines, and SEM-EDS lies! I am a king of ice, a geomorph’s sage, Whose glacial theory ye dare call dead and cold!
Here I stand, with map of Preseli’s frost, The Newall Boulder’s facets, my crown of proof! No striations, say ye? Mere weathering’s tale? I laugh at thy naivety, ye lumpers blind! Forty-six rock types, by my troth, I count, Not thy scant twelve—human hands ne’er moved these stones! Ice did the labour, o’er Salisbury’s plain it swept, Yet ye, with quarrying dreams, deny my reign!
Let the storm of thy papers crack and fall, Thy Rhosyfelin quarry, a phantom’s jest! No wedges nor rails, but nature’s own art, And I, old John, shall prove it with my fist! Parker Pearson’s ghosts, abandon thy claims, Waun Mawn’s erratics mock thy dismantled throne! I’ll rant ‘gainst this tide, though the world turn deaf, For glacial glory shall rise, or I’ll curse the sod!